Not a Bang - Not Even a Whimper

Wherein Our Heroine Predictably Falls Asleep In Front of the Television.

My friend Elizabeth said she wanted me to write about the Academy Awards. As I'm stumped for any other subject matter, I suppose Oscar is a trampoline I can bounce on this morning.

I did watch about two hours of the show last night, and before I fell asleep I saw something that made me very sad. Katharine Hepburn passed away this year and the producers of the show honored her with a montage of photos and film. Her accomplishments (not the least of which included growing old gracefully and naturally) were met with the most tepid reaction imaginable by the Belle Monde of Hollywood. Polite, quiet applause dutifully filled the auditorium. It appeared that the glamorously clad, dyed, lifted, tucked and botoxed crowd found this piece of Hollywood history a wee bit tedious.

There was an additional montage honoring other notables in film who died this year. It was clear by the utter lack of applause as some of the names and photographs flashed by that not only were these people unknown to the crowd, but the crowd didn't even care to give them the benefit of the doubt with the bare minimum of clapping. The montage ended with a photo of Donald O'Connor, mugging outrageously in a signature moment from "Make 'Em Laugh." The applause had more or less died off to a trickle at this point and did not revive. Were the masses of jewel-clad glitterati bored, or had they not seen "Singin' in the Rain"? Either is possible. One thing is for sure: the well of politeness that they were willing to grant to Ms. Hepburn was dry.

It's a tired cop-out to mock the vapidity and vanity of Hollywood, and I do not belong to the school of thought that honors the dead more than the living. However, I wonder what was going through these peoples' heads.

Given all the diamonds that were in evidence that night, I can guess the only thought was, "Ooooh. Shiny."

Posted: Monday - March 01, 2004 at 07:58 AM | |